They call me Smashley.

Over the last few months, I have been asked a couple of questions about 514,250 times:

1. Will you please tell me about yourself?
2. What do you like to do in your free time?

Frankly, I’ve had so many interviews lately that I am sick of talking about myself. But starting a new position this week, I’m making every effort to embrace the two-ears-one-mouth policy. As in, listen at least twice as much as you speak!

Supporting this attitude is the fact that I am, once again, working in an industry that is new to me. I am very happy, once again, to have an exciting challenge to learn and write about brand-new topics. When I was in B2B publishing, we used to say, “a good writer can write about anything,” and I really believe that’s true. It’s true with writing, marketing, and sales. My friend Jason says that the less a sales person understands what they are selling, the better they do. I disagree somewhat — I would say that it’s not about understanding, it’s about technique.

A sharp professional who has the technique can come to understand a new industry and it’s subtleties. But guess what … relying on all technique and no understanding is an ego-driven, naive, greedy, or just plain stupid move — that person will fail because he or she is egotistical, naive, greedy, or stupid. Thus, the two-ears-one-mouth policy!

What is happening in my brain during all this two-eared policy is interesting, exciting, and totally exhausting.

I. Love. It.

Why am I ok with not sleeping tonight?! I suppose a huge part of that is because I have blissfully nothing to do tomorrow. I’ve been working on a friend’s resume this week, and one other friend of hers, to help with their job searches, so I plan to finish up a lot for them tomorrow. But after much stress about where I would be tomorrow, err… later today … I’m totally at peace with having a day of doing nothing. Tomorrow is a little staycation, if you will!

Recently, I met with a couple of career coaches who helped me realize many things. First, we defined my ideal job that would serve my career goals. Also, many of my personal goals and strengths took shape during my session. Such clarity has greatly benefited me in many ways.

The aforementioned dream job: I start Tuesday. Turning down job offers and even interviews in this economy is stressful, but I feel led to this job for the next phase of my life. And I do feel like this is a life change, not just a career change.

Second, some clarity in my personal life: I miss physically volunteering. I have particpated in the online microvolunteering at sparked.com, but I miss doing things like heading a blanket drive for Jonathan’s Place or volunteering at Baylor alum activities like Shoes for Orphan Souls. One of my coaches helped me realize that my drive to volunteer — to give back to my community — was tied to my concept of being a part of a church. Probably true, but other true facts include: Pesky morals for friendship, leadership, service ingrained in me in my Baylor days as a proud member of Alpha Phi Omega. 

A third note on a personal level: Meeting a special person is, well, pretty special. I have so many special people in my life, and I am blessed and grateful. That concept of “accept help” has been so hard for me for about a decade, but one of the lessons my career coaches identified was that I am not alone. Accepting that I am not alone is pretty crucial to this step. 

The morning air is cool and relaxing. I wish I had a dog to check on or nudge off my lap right now. Instead, I will grab a few hours sleep and have a tune-up on my car and get my tires rotated to prepare for my new commute to my new, amazing job. 

If you’re reading this, I love you. And you all know how, and why. And how to find me on Pinterest. 

I learned this morning that my friend John Anderson passed away. Although I felt blue all day, I had phone calls and interviews that I needed to be “on” for, so I set my sadness aside as best I could.

This evening, I finally allowed myself to feel the loss of my friend John. Unfortunately, I’ve known other loss of friends and family, but all these experiences help me grow. I would prefer only good experiences, but the world doesn’t work that way.

My friend John was smart, funny, honest, and very witty.Godspeed, John Anderson.

We just want to be America’s favorite store. We don’t have to be America’s flashiest store; we just want to be America’s favorit store.

Ron Jonhson, CEO, J.C. Penny

Retail genius Ron John joined J.C. Penny as CEO, and without even realizing why, I started loving the JCP marketing efforts. I like the spin they put on the new pricing structure. I like the choice of Ellen Degenerous as spokesperson. I’ve like the products they carry for a long time, so all these factors dovetail into a really nice marketing effort, as far as I’m concerned.

I’m vaguely aware of some activist organizations protesting the selection of Ellen Degenerous as spokesperson because of her sexuality. But from a marketing perspective, she is an excellent choice. Beyond lending her face, voice, and humor to JCP’s marketing efforts, Degnerous has also shared JCP’s new marketing vision with her own audience. She is a well-established, and frankly, well loved, brand. It’s not easy getting another brand to evangelize your own brand.

I had a great call today during which I got excited about the power of getting another brand to evangelize your brand. Sorry … that’s marketing speak for saying, “anyone with influence who is willing to refer you is good.”

Ron Johnson has a unique combination of marketing savvy (getting others to promote his brand), and eye for customer service. His design for the layout of Target stores was eventually copied by retail giant Walmart — to the extreme! Walmart changed its logo, store facades, and made drastic changes to the square footage it devoted to departments.

I must appreciate Ron Johnson as the inventor of the Genius Bar. I’ve spent many hours at them. What a remarkable move toward improving customer service! I would think moving toward “free” additional support and customer service would seem threatening to the bottom line, but Apple has proved the opposite. Brand loyalty is worth billions.

How a save-happy person like me can lose a blog post is beyond me. But, I did. I wrote the most fascinating blog about integrating Google analytics into all of my social media platforms!

I believe my inspiration was a fun and informative event I attended last night, the DFW chapter of the American Marketing Association. I loved getting my marketing fu ON!

One guy I exchanged cards with said, “Moo? Mine, too!” Referring to the printing service we both used for our business cards. He went with the more edgy rounded corners, but I had a cooler, more personal design on front, in my humble opinion.

I have a lot of questions about getting into marketing for non-profits, and the AMA has tons of great resources. I’m excited about learning about new areas of marketing!

From the shared brain of Angela Doo, me, and God’s universe, this week is all about cupcakes and rocking out. I split an earth-shattering cupcake with a musically inclined coworker, so I suggested that we create a song about said cupcake. He agreed. At the time it was a really funny joke, but I totally started the lyrics. Meanwhile, Angela’s Daily Creativity project that day was a rocker chick she once called Cupcake.

I’m not much of an artist — I’ve did one oil painting I like, and I did one piece in pastels that I love but gave to someone (P.S. total waste of awesome pastel drawing). I prefer to express my creative genius in words and a bit of crafty — but Angela has really inspired me to explore how to participate in her Daily Creativity challage. Last month, I did my own version of her sugar skull project. This month, I knew I wanted to come up with some kind of gift to her because her December theme was about gifts. The cupcake conversation inspired me!

I started a painting, like on paper, for her last night. Tonight, I finished it, as planned. But this morning Angela told me today was National Cupcake Day!

How crazy is that?!

Tonight’s finished product (from no kind of painter, although I kind of like it):

I have a WARM HEART.

Recently I’ve been exploring the theme of love. I’m writing, talking, and reading about love non-stop lately. (Reading list: Rob Sheffield’s Love Is a Mix Tape.)

Today’s inspirational quotation of the day was beautiful. I wanted to make my friend something around the quotation as a gift for her month of gifts, but somehow I lost sight of how I thought she’d be better for it. It does seem to fit in brilliantly with the conversations, books, writing, and thoughts in life lately:

Last night I had a marathon 90-minute phone call with a friend. Describing my history with this friend as “complicated” is kind, but I’m OK with it. He’s a true, loyal friend to me; and I’m a true, loyal friend to him. I think the beauty of our roles in each other’s lives is this reflection to “Let God have you. Let God love you.” We each beat ourselves up a lot, but meanwhile have an amazing ability to see only the most lovely characteristics in each other.

Our emotions ranged from laughter to tears because we our conversation ranged from loss, love, learning to live after loss, learning to live after losing love, hating being in love, and loving love. Love is so imperfect, just like we all are….

How am I, the weakest, poorest, worst creature that God created, able to know God’s love? Grace. My friends, grace.

I have known love, so I treasure that blessing. But for now I must depend on God to have me and love me. Because surely He will bring me joy!

I spent lots of time with my sister and nieces this weekend. We dug out my old yearbooks from K-12 — with a few gaps — and I’d like to highlight some of the more memorable things that were said.

• “I guess you were really sweet when you were my age.” RE: What most people told me in my seventh grade yearbook.
• Exception to the signatures in my seventh grade yearbook:
  “Roses are red, violets are blue, your mother is pretty, what happened to you? D.S.” (Gee, I wonder who that was.)
• “When Darla gets old, maybe I’ll give her to you.”
  “Why do you think it’s a good idea to give me your old dog?”
  “Because I don’t like old dogs. Except for Lilly. And Peanut.”
• “Wow, Aunt Ashley, you were really pretty then!”
• “I had a perm … and do you remember that jumpsuit?!?”
  “Was it … salmon colored?”
  “YES!”
  Snorting, riotous laughter ensued…
  “PLEASE tell me that you tight-rolled the pant legs!!”

Another thing I noticed is that in way too many of these yearbook photos is that I wore sailor collars. A LOT.

Every time I would exclaim, “OH! THAT’S who she is!” my older niece would say, “Facebook?” Yep, because she knew that I was fully connecting names and faces with exactly what these people were to me!

Now that I have all these yearbooks, I’ll be sorting through Facebook friend requests much more quickly.

And probably continue to have more bizarre dreams incorporating past people with future or present situations, as I did this weekend.

I wasn’t planning to write tonight, much less publish, because early this morning I had a realization that kind of broke my heart a little bit. And no matter what, even a little bit of a broken heart is still a broken heart. In my experience, no matter what it’s over, how prepared for it I am, how certain I am that I’m better because of it or better off from it, a broken heart is one of life’s less enjoyable experiences.

What’s so important or fascinating or urgent that compelled me to boot up the MacBook Pro despite my instinct to keep to myself? The butchering of my favorite Christmas song.

That’s right, transgress me — make me a promise you don’t keep, take me for granted, underpay me, take advantage of my friendship, refuse me an opportunity to make amends, or, yes, even break my heart — and I’ll try to be honorable toward you. But sing Mary Did You Know not-so-well? You’re going to get it! I’m looking at you, Rascal Flatts!

I ordered a new bed, which came yesterday, but I couldn’t do anything about it because I had to finish going over my niece’s research paper. Tonight I planned to attack my old bed with a vengance to break it down and get it out of here. Bones was keeping me company on the TV, but that ended as I finished the dismantle.

CMA Country Christmas was on as I started hauling pieces to the dumpster. I came back from my first trip, and Rascal Flatts was butchering my favorite Christmas song. I just happened to walk in the door when they got to a particularly difficult part of the song, but I will show no mercy. Rascal Flatts: Either rehearse the difficult song several thousand more times in the venue before performing, or stick to a Christmas song in your range.

LET IT BE KNOWN: Two artists — TWO — can do justice to Mary, Did You Know:

1. Michael English, who recorded it first on his debut album. Hearing Michael English sing this live at the Ferrell Center when I was in school was an amazing experience. I could feel the weight of Heaven trying to burst into the stadium to marvel at the wonder and awe of the Christmas miracle.
   

   02_Mary,_Did_You_Know.mp3 Listen on Posterous
2. The Katinas, who have the natural harmony that only brothers can and a beautiful humility when performing that portrays the awesome depth of emotion in the lyrics of the song.
   

   03_Mary_Did_You_Know.m4a Listen on Posterous

LET IT BE KNOWN: Reba, Kenny Rogers, Wynonna, and certainly not Clay Aiken — who should be fined like a mouthy, homophobic NBA player for having the arrogance for even thinking about recording Mary, Did You Know — cannot do justice to this song. People, stop trying. Especially country artists. I suspect some random rocker could bring a new take to it, but unless you have something new to add — like The Katinas — keep yer trap shut and move on to another Christmas song. BUT ESPECIALLY RASCAL FLATTS. The Baby Jesus is crying because of your cacophony tonight.

I worked myself up into that rant in my second trip to the dumpster. But when I was chucking the pieces in, I had to admire my careful selection of what I thought was a nice bed. For some years, it was a nice bed. It matched my beautiful bedroom furniture very well, and it was chosen for how different it was than anything I’d ever had before. Already slightly emotional from the day’s heartbreak, despite a pretty good day overall, I allowed myself a brief moment to reminisce while I schlepped out more trash.

The last trip to the dumpster is when I realized that my recent desires and plans to rid myself of most of the stuff in my apartment — boxes and boxes of decorations I have no place for, clothes I have no room for, books I have no more use for — that I’m just in a phase that I’ve had before. I’m  repeating old patterns, and I’m probably chasing an “unattainable” dream that is only unattainable because deep down I don’t believe I deserve to attain it.

When I got out of the shower a little bit later, Amy Grant and Vince Gill were singing Breath of Heaven. I sat on the couch just in time for her to sing, “Help me be strong. Help me be. Help me.”

Wow. And ouch. Wouch.

The way that prayer, that plea, devolves (or does it evolve?!) has always moved me.

My new bed isn’t even out of the box yet, so I’m going full-on ghetto for a couple of nights with the mattress on the floor. I’ve changed the orientation of my mattress, but it has clean sheets on it, and I’m fresh from a shower, so I’ll sleep well, I hope! I may get thrown off when I get up to go to the bathroom, but no worries!

Help me be strong. Help me be. Help me. So, no worries. I’m covered.